when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
My vagina is very pro this idea
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
