Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
