so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i just google imaged poop.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize