you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
