ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
