do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
