If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize