He asked to "fluff my boner.."
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Randomize
