While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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