is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
