I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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