Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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