There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I wish I only lived at night.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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