I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
