I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize