Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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