do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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