Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
