Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Maybe he injected his testicle?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
