Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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