she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
