hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
