go do what you do best...puke behind churches
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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