O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Randomize
