Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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