You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
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