butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
