dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
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