Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
