I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
