if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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