Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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