how can u be prego again
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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