Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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