Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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