I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
