i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
We don't watch enough power rangers
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize
