im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize