Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Randomize
