what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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