I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize