Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
