dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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