Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
