none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
