i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
