I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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