I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Randomize