It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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