Your dad touched me again.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
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